I have a list of things to do. I can order them by urgency and importance (separate scales!) but this doesn’t temper the “panic! do it now! can’t do it now! panic!” status that my brain awards in diplomatically and democratically equal measure to everything on the list. So I do nothing, and fret about doing nothing. To break this thought loop I’ll give myself a tiny task, and today’s “omg I can’t draw worth shit” loop was to be broken by a quick portrait of my pet cactus Joe the Cactus drawing of the cactus that sits on my desk.

[Pentel brush pen for ink; Cotman brush + cheap but trusty watercolours I bought in a supermarket ten years ago. No pencil prelim because that's for wusses.]

Brain Half #1: Yay I drew something! Look, I’m scanning it too! TRIUMPH.
Brain Half #2: It’s not a very exciting picture of a cactus.
Brain Half #1: It’s a picture OF A CACTUS.

Am I helping myself at all? Fuck knows.